1. GOD USES THE UNPREPARED
Some of you may read this sentence and immediately think of ways that this is not true. So before anyone draws wrong conclusions, let me explain what I mean. Before my trip to the Philippines, I spent about two weeks preparing my heart and mind to go on this trip. I remember spending several hours thinking of ways that I would share the Gospel with children and people, and I even came up with some devotional/sermon outlines that I would try to use while in the Philippines. However, I remember feeling like these things I prepared were somehow not good enough or maybe not going to be the "right fit" for this trip. Regardless, I soon found out that GOD USES THE UNPREPARED in miraculous ways. I cannot explain how many times I would be talking to a child or an adult, and although I had my prepared words to share, the Holy Spirit would prompt me to share something completely different. For example, while at a public school, I started talking to three adults towards the end of our team's visit at that school. I remember that my only intention for talking to them was to see if I could share the Gospel with them. Well it turns out that as I talked to them, the Lord prompted me to share with them my testimony leading up to my teaching experience at Pensacola Christian College. It turns out that two of the ladies were actually principals at this school and another school we would visit later on. While I spoke to them, I shared what God taught me about the difference between being a secular teacher and a Christian teacher, in addition to how teaching is not a job, but a ministry. (Both of these topics I studied and learned while earning my M.S. at PCC these past two years) Well, to make a long story short, these ladies were so blessed with what I shared (remember that I had NOT PREPARED this talk at all) that they asked me if I would be willing to speak with all the teachers of this school, and the next one that we were going to. You have no idea how shocked I was at first. I am one of those people who likes to prepared and do all things to the best of my ability, so when they ask me to speak to their teachers with only five minutes to think of what I would share with them, I immediately called to God for help. Honestly, the things that I shared with all those teachers that day from those two schools were things that God has taught me over the past four years in college and my teaching experiences. I don't recall sharing any incredible advice or million dollar worth information. My words were simply a direct result of the immediate prompting and leading of the Holy Spirit. After seeing several teachers get saved after our conversation and hearing from various of them how what I shared with them blessed their lives, I remember breaking into tears in the car on our way home. I could not believe how God would use me in this way. You see, it is a wonderful thing for us to be able to see children come to the Lord, but when we were able to reach the teachers for Christ, this can have a much lasting and bigger impact in the schools we visited. These teachers can go on to follow the Lord and continue to share the Gospel to the students who come to these schools. So, the lesson I learned through this experience is that GOD USES THE UNPREPARED. In Exodus 4: 11-12 God said to Moses, "Who hath made man's mouth? or who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? have not I the LORD? Now therefore go, and I will be with thy mouth, and teach thee what thou shalt say." The lesson is that it doesn't matter how much I prepared for this trip or not, or how good or bad I am at speaking or talking to people. The lesson is that if I allow the Lord to use me even when I am not prepared, He can BE WITH MY MOUTH, AND TEACH ME WHAT I SHALT SAY. Believe me, I saw how God used me to bless these teachers in the Philippines, and I was overwhelmed about how much my faith grew when I saw GOD USE MY UNPREPARED SELF!
2. HONESTY EQUALS LIGHT. SHAME EQUALS DARKNESS.
This is an interesting concept to ponder. What exactly do I mean by this? Well, let me explain. In Ephesians 5: 11-13, Paul states, "And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them. For it is a shame even to speak of those things which are done of them in secret. But all things that are reproved are made manifest by the light: for whatsoever doth make manifest is light." This is a lesson that God began to reveal to me back when I was 15 years old. It's been about eight years since then, and I can tell you that I realize the importance for us as Christians to be honest about our lives. Honesty requires us to speak of what God has done in our lives - the good and the bad. I have gone on several mission trips in the past, and I have firsthand seen how God has used my testimony to change lives and encourage those who hear it. However, something was different on this trip to the Philippines. Rather than it being all about me sharing my testimony to others, God had me meet numerous Christian young people who willingly shared with me their testimonies and daily struggles and temptations. Each one of these brave and honest individuals challenged me in numerous ways. There is something incredible when you get the opportunity to hear how God miraculously saves a person from sin and darkness. All of us have secret issues in our lives, whether they are shameful past sins or even present failures and weaknesses. However, we constantly wonder why God does not give us freedom from these issues. I remember how between the ages of 15 and 17 I struggled a lot with dealing with temptation and sins that I fell to on a daily basis. I remember reading this passage from Ephesians 5 and understanding that what often keeps us as Christians in bondage to our sins is the simple fact that we let shame keep us from admitting our sins and failures to others. However, when we fail to be honest about our problems and rather walk around pretending like we are all good and nothing is wrong, we begin to live fake lives where we look good on the outside, but are rotting on the inside. I cannot tell you enough how blessed I was to meet these young Christian people in the Philippines who openly admitted to being in a restoration period from their previous sins. They didn't have anything to hide or didn't try to share with me how good they were or what they could do that could impress me. Rather, they shared with me the deep issues of their lives and shared how God had brought them up from the miry clay of their sins of lust, pornography, fornication, lying, drugs, or even suicidal attempts. Some of the most precious and treasured moments on my trip to the Philippines were those I spent in tears and prayer with several of these young people. I will never forget how amazed I was with their testimonies and how God used them to reinforce the importance of this lesson that HONESTY EQUALS LIGHT and SHAME EQUALS DARKNESS. I want to be God's child of light and this requires me to be honest and open about the areas that I have failed my Lord and which He has helped me to have victory over. Now, this by no means requires us to post online all of our "dirty laundry" for the whole world to see, as this would be unnecessary and foolish. But what this truth does requires is that we are honest first of all to ourselves about who we really are. We must realize whether we are living secret lives and have shameful things that keep us away from God's true and perfect light. In addition, this truth requires us to have accountability partners who will pray for us and keep us accountable on a daily basis in order for us not to fall into sin. And finally, although we do not publicly need to share all our past or present sins, we should be willing to allow God to use our testimonies to help, encourage, challenge, and even convict others who He allows us to share with. I cannot express the joy that I have to be able to serve as an accountability partner to several young people who I met in the Philippines. There is nothing better or even more rewarding in a relationship or friendship than to know "the real person" of an individual or friend. Words can impress; actions can deceive; and beauty and smiles can distract. But true honesty results in God-given peace and victory that has the power to change lives and show the light of Christ to all those who we meet in this dark and shameful world!
3. GOD REVEALS HIS WILL WHEN WE LEAST EXPECT IT
If you have made it this far on this super gigantic post, I commend you and congratulate you that you are almost done! I will do my best to keep this last point as short as possible. If you have followed me on instagram or facebook, you will remember that a few days ago, I posted a picture with the subtitle saying "a picture is worth a thousand words." Some of my hashtags were #ilovethephilippines, #imcomingback, and #possiblefutureministry. Well, I received messages from some of you excited to know what all these phrases and thoughts meant. The big question being: DID GOD CALL YOU TO BE A MISSIONARY IN THE PHILIPPINES? The answer will be given by the end of this post. But, I want to give you a little background before I answer this question. I took my first mission trip to Mexico back when I was 16 years old with my boy scout troop and my whole family. However, it wasn't until my three month Mexico trip back in 2009 that God confirmed his calling of my life to be a missionary. In fact, it's been five years since I have known that I would be a full-time missionary sometime in the future. During these past five years, I have prayed so fervently to know what God has called me to specifically. During my undergraduate studies at Pensacola Christian College, God confirmed my calling to work with orphans and Christian schools. So, for as long as I can remember, I have known that someday in the future I wanted to serve the Lord by starting an orphanage and running a Christian school. However, one major piece of the puzzle for my life has been missing. WHERE WAS I CALLED TO MINISTER? I have had numerous friends who have discovered God's calling in their lives and have found a burden for specific countries where they will minister to. I have watched many of them go on deputation and now begin their ministries in these specific countries where God has called them to. I remember asking them, as well as several veteran missionaries who I love, admire, and look up to, how and when they knew that God had called them to a specific country. Many of them just responded by saying that it was something that they "just knew" and that God revealed to them through lots of prayer and thought. And so, for the past few years, I have been doing a lot of this praying and thinking, attempting to somehow get this burden for some country of which I am meant to be a missionary to. However, it seemed like God was not hearing me and no answer came. I went to Ukraine for a whole summer in 2012 and completely fell in love with the country and people. However, although I loved the opportunities that I had in Ukraine, somehow I still was uncertain whether that was the right place for me or not. Then, last year in 2013, I had the opportunity to go to Peru where I worked alongside the Earnhart family, a missionary family who has been dear to my heart for as long as I can remember. John and Becky Earnhart have truly been one of my greatest inspirations and role models for what I want to be like in my future missionary ministry. And although I honestly could see myself going to Peru to work with them and their ministry, my heart was still heavy and weary of whether Peru was truly the place where I was call to work as a full time missionary. So, to summarize, I felt like Mexico resulted in my love and calling for missions; Ukraine resulted in my love and calling to minister to a foreign culture unlike any I was accustomed to; and Peru resulted in my love and calling to follow the incredible example of veteran missionaries John and Becky Earnhart. However, I still wondered if and when I would finally get that peace about where my mission field was to be. And so, the Philippines comes to the picture. I went on this missions trip partly because of a desire that I had back when I was 15 years old to go on a missions trip to the Philippines. I remember being 15 years old and sitting at Tri-County Baptist Church during one of our missions conferences listening to the Lewis missionary family explain their ministry to the Philippines. I remember getting a burden back then to visit this country someday and share the Gospel. I also got really excited when a young man who I looked up to was also called to the Philippines as a full time missionary and I remember thinking back then how cool it would be if God would allow me to go to the Philippines. Well, as you all know, I was able to go to the Philippines these past few weeks and what an amazing and life-changing trip this was for me. Little did I know that God would reveal Himself to me on this trip. How did He do this? Well, to be 100% honest, I don't know exactly. I just know that seeing hundreds of children in need and with so much eagerness and willingness to hear the message of Christ, seeing adults with soft hearts to listen to the Gospel and give their lives to Christ, seeing an 83 year old woman who could only understand the Gospel through Bible flashcards give her life to Christ with the most genuine and simply prayer I have ever heard, seeing the incredible example of a Christian single mother who sacrificially gives away of her time, work, and money to lead a team of young people on this missions trip for God to use us for His glory, seeing pastors who seek the Lord and ask Him to send forth laborers to their country, and seeing the faces of orphans who ask me if I can come back and teach them more about Jesus - all of these things and many more of which I cannot even begin to name made an impact in my life. When I left the Philippines, it took till my final flight to Houston for me to loose it completely. I was siting on the plane next to my sister Hannah who was resting and I was crying like a little baby. I realized right then and there that I had left half of my heart in the Philippines. The feelings that I have towards this country and the people and children are unlike any other I have ever felt. Like those I had asked before, I "just knew" that God has called me to go back to the Philippines. So, to answer that question that I began this whole lesson with, the answer is YES, I AM GOING BACK TO THE PHILIPPINES! I told my mom yesterday that it would be so okay with me to drop everything right now and go back immediately to start my full-time work there. However, this would be foolish and unwise. I know that God still has a few more years of training, schooling, and work here in the USA that He will use to equip me to be the best servant I can be for Him in the Philippines. But, please rejoice with me as I praise the Lord for confirming this great calling in my life. I trust that this serves as an encouragement to all of you who may be waiting for the Lord to reveal His will for your lives and who have not heard from Him yet. Remember that although it may take several years, GOD REVEALS HIS WILL WHEN WE LEAST EXPECT IT! This truth is described in the well-known passage of Jeremiah 33:3 which states, "Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not." I look forward to the next several years as I begin my journey towards my future ministry to the Philippines!
To God be all the glory and praise! Thank you for your continual prayers and support. Please leave a comment on facebook or on this blog post or message me if you should have any specific questions or prayer requests for me to answer or pray for you as well. I love you all!
What a blessing this is. Thank you for sharing. God bless you!
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